Humans have the tendency to compare themselves to each other. As writers we look at what our fellow authors have accomplished and get bogged down if we aren’t achieving the same thing. It’s a toxic habit and something that will kill your creativity and cause some serious burnout.
We are all different. Some of us have spouses, children, demanding jobs, illnesses, etc. It’s impossible that we all achieve the same things at the same time. First, how incredibly boring would that be? I find joy in helping others and working with mentors. We all need to be at various levels to keep the circle of support going.
Second, we all define success differently. Our big picture is not the same as our peers. Selling ten books in one month might thrill an author, but disappoint another. Focus on the most important thing: YOU.
Third, surround yourself with supportive people. You want to be in relationships, friendships, and partnerships that are two-way streets. You want to be supported while being supportive. That’s how a healthy balance works and that is an awesome way to create a solid foundation for your goals. Get rid of the folks who do nothing but place themselves on platforms and talk about their shit all day long, seven days a week. It’s great to toot your own horn about your accomplishments, but there is a fine line before it becomes annoying and tacky. And no one has time for energy vampires either. Helping others is wonderful, but there comes a time where folks need to start making moves to help themselves.
Finally, be authentic. Follow your heart and dance to your own beat. If you do this, I promise you will attract those who you need in your life. Work at your own pace. If your big goal seems overwhelming, then break it down into smaller goals and when you reach them - celebrate!
It’s okay to be hard on yourself. You need to be, but don’t compare yourself to others. It’s a waste of time and energy. So maybe someone posted online that they wrote 3,426 words and you’ve only managed to squeak out 655. No worries. Pat yourself on the back for writing today and if it really bothers you that much, then stay off social media, turn off the TV, and write.